June 12, 2009   3 notes
FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

June 12, 2009   4 notes
That’s a wrap.

That’s a wrap.

June 12, 2009   2 notes
Today is the last day I’ll be working for the company I’ve been with for a year and a half.
My Craigslist autorefresh terror alert level is on “high”.

Today is the last day I’ll be working for the company I’ve been with for a year and a half.

My Craigslist autorefresh terror alert level is on “high”.

June 11, 2009   8 notes
Conan’s lighting controls are insane.

Conan’s lighting controls are insane.

June 11, 2009   3 notes

“ I wish I was DNA Helicase so I can unzip ur genes. ”

Top 10 Twitter Pick-Up Lines

June 11, 2009   2 notes
June 10, 2009   18 notes

This is my contribution to national television.  Conan looked me in the fucking eyes and asked me if I liked his joke.

My life will never be the same.

June 10, 2009   2 notes

“ Petrol station worker Alan dived to scoop up Hannah just as she slid out across the floor - still attached to her mother via her umbilical cord. ”

Mother gives birth down her trouser leg

Best newsquote of the week.

June 9, 2009   13 notes

Tonight's Conan

(the one that none of you gave a shit about attending):

I’m on the band-side of the audience, second row from the stage, pretty close to the tunnel in the middle.  I’m the only person in the area wearing a yellow t-shirt.  Jake Lloyd is right behind me, and John Reep (winner of Last Comic Standing) was about eight rows behind us.  It was strange that a former guest of the show couldn’t score a better seat.

In the monolouge, Conan mentions Green Bay, WI.  I did the appropriate thing, and woo’d for my hometown.  He made eye-contact, and said something about how he feels sorry for me because people from Green Bay aren’t used to black people.  I’m paraphrasing, but I was too lost in the moment to know what the hell happened.

Eddie Murphy said “shit” once and “fuck” twice in a row.  I think they might edit that out.

Good times.

June 9, 2009   22 notes
June 9, 2009   4 notes
June 9, 2009   1 note

SoCal Homies:

Are you busy this afternoon/early evening?

Are you a fan of Conan O’Brien?

If you answered “no” to one of these questions, and “yes” to another, you might want to email me right now.